Wallbanger by Alice Clayton

Interior Designer Caroline has just moved into her dream apartment in San Francisco, sublet to her by her boss.  It’s a gorgeous place and she is really happy with it, except she gets woken at stupid o’clock in the morning by the sound of her neighbour’s bed banging into the wall as he ‘entertains’ a rather noisy companion, who enjoys being spanked.  The next night, he makes a different woman meow in bed, a noise that unfortunately makes Caroline’s cat Clive uber horny. Soon he is entertaining yet another lady in bed.  The disturbed sleep would be bad enough, but Caroline is also pretty jealous.  She had a one-night stand a while ago that was pretty forgettable, except that since then she has been missing her ‘O’, as she refers to it, and Simon, who she dubs ‘Wallbanger’ doesn’t seem to have that problem at all.

One night, she decides she’s had enough, and storms around there wearing a very fetching pink babydoll nightie.  She finds to her chagrin that Wallbanger is actually pretty hot, even if he is a smug arse.  Caroline is not the type to keep much to herself, so soon all her closest friends are well aware of the Wallbanger saga, but not that Caroline has begun to dream about him.  Soon, she and Simon meet each other socially, through mutual friends, and have to make a truce of sorts.  Wallbanger and Pink Nightie Girl soon become really good friends and have a lot of mutual attraction but Simon has never been the type to settle down with a girlfriend and Caroline is not about to join his harem of women, even if it does seem as though he might be a good candidate to help her recover her ‘O’.

This was such a funny story! Neither Caroline or Simon seem to keep much close to their chests, it’s all out there so it’s not the most subtle of relationships but I loved their banter and smutty innuendo, they were such a fun couple, and had such a lot of laughs.  Their close friends are also in the story, and although they were much less developed characters they certainly helped in forwarding the plot. Caroline has the funniest conversations with herself. 

“Was the Giggler out of the harem?

Was there even a harem left?

What did this mean?

Would I only think in questions now?

And if so, who is Eric Cartman’s father?”

The way she personified her ‘O’ reminded me a little bit of Ana talking about her ‘Inner Goddess’ in 50 Shades of Grey but she did it with such humour that instead of finding her annoying I was quite happy laughing at and along with Caroline.

“He was wooing me. And I was letting him woo. I wanted the woo. I deserved the woo.  I needed the wow that would surely follow the woo, but for now, the woo? It was whoa.”

Is this literature that will open your mind and expand your horizons? No.  Is it a very entertaining book that you’ll read with a smile on your face and will keep you laughing? It certainly did for me J